Dogs and children have been warned away from the lake. The force of the explosions is impressive. "It's like hitting a slightly rotten orange with a golf iron," one Green activist said yesterday.

Labels: health

Haven't had an actual roommate in a while. Kid from work and his dog are staying at house for ca. 1 month while other apts. open up. Kid will take care of our dogs during wedding + jamaica. Good setup.

Haven't had an actual roommate in a while. What is this going to be like again? And i never know, do i have to feed it? What if i'm making dinner and it smells good? How does this work? Who's going to buy the milk? Is he going to eat my bagels? Is he going to empty the dishwasher sometimes? Can i get him to mow the lawn? Is he going to use all the pots i need for making food? What are we going to do about breakfasts? What if he hates the smell of onions? Am i going to feel weird if i'm eating and he's not? If he's eating and i'm not? What if our bed is squeaky, which it is, only i so don't care? What if the guest-room bed is squeaky? Does he buy his own laundry detergent? What if i get all bitchy, which happens pretty regularly with wedding stress and bullshit (and M is lovely and wonderful for dealing with)? eep.

Haven't had an actual roommate in a while. Fuckin' A. i am jack's walking tower of anxiety. If roommate wasn't your friend you wouldn't let him in your house in the first place. Chill.

Labels: people

which is a card game, only with dominoes, which switch sides, unless they're trump or doubles. So first, you follow suit. And second, you pay attention to who's winning because you're always trying to screw (euchre?) the other team. So you avoid playing the five-types on tricks that the other team is going to win, only you have to follow suit, and you don't have to trump. And the dominoes switch, so a six-one is if you lead it, a suit of six, number one, and if somebody else leads funny, it's a suit of one, number six, unless sixes are trump, in which case it's always a trump, number one, which is the second lowest trump, or unless ones are trump, in which case it's the second highest trump (because the double one is bigger than the six) and would be good to hold on to, only either way it's not as good as a six-four. And you have to keep track of the things the other people have played, so you can know how much you still have to screw the other team. And you have to know where the double-five and the six-four are. And you have to bid, which is the hardest. thing. ever. i am terrible at bidding. but i'm always terrible at bidding. i have no instinct for it. it's so not in my blood to do this. i mean, we don't do this, in my family, we play those National Geographic games, or Clue, or ... (seriously, i can't remember the last time in Clue that i didn't know what the cards were, whether or not it was actually my turn when that became clear. so i have lost, but just because it wasn't my turn. i have such an instinct for Clue. but it uses a lot of paper.) and going from National Geographic and a glass of wine to 42 and a couple of beers, it's like learning a new language. It's like learning to ski. It's an entirely different world of game. So i absolutely suck. Which makes it funny. Especially after the requisite couple of beers.

Labels: texas

because everything is tripping over itself to line up in order, just for me. examples:
1. boss may be taking leave of absence. This is, if i do not get job X, fantastic.
2. we'll see how that interview went, but it was definitely pretty good.
3. i found an $8 swim suit at Target that actually isn't too bad. And is a halter top, so i can have some variety in my tan lines. i'm really excited about the $8 swim suit. it's navy blue bikini with white piping. as decent butt coverage as can be expected. Suppourt. Fits on top. This is absolutely exceptional.
4. the knot's To Do Wedding List is not making me panic. what do we have to do, left? Music (diy/iTunes/find speakers), decide - programs or no?, write ceremony and vows, find babysitter, organize booze, sign lots of contracts, get sixpack abs (well, we'll see), plant people for Unscripted Quaker Time. (any volunteers for Unscripted Quaker Time? eh? ehhhh? c'mon.) Shit, we're doing pretty well here.
5. my house is clean and the laundry is mostly put away. These are good.
6. i like grapefruit. combined with, i have grapefruit. And this will be over soon, but is nice while it lasts. Texas grapefruits - at least the ones i've got right now - are surprisingly good.

Labels: random

Labels: wedding

i've been caught up to. By someone who, now, makes a great story (that i most recently told a week and a half ago i think), and i'm going to so get in trouble for this. This is bad karma. Right here. ka-POW. There go my chances at being reincarnated as a sea otter. It's spotted owl from here on out. Or maybe this is my karma catching up with me? Because i've done this, too. You find someone and email them, out of the blue. And you know they're thinking, jeez, i barely knew you back then, what the hell are you talking about, here? All the stupid shit they did that affected you so much and never even occured to them that it might. And it's not going to change anything for them, now, and you know it when you're writing them, and you know it when you hit 'send,' and you know you can't keep doing this or you'll be a stalker. It's a one-shot thing. And for the record, karma takes roughly seven years. This particular karma, anyway. (god, i'm old.) So. Here i am being written to, now, on the other end. And what do you do - what can you do? Like, kid, you don't even qualify as an ex. I had no idea. Have you really been thinking about it for this long? And if you write back, are you feeding some kind of neurosis? And if you don't, are you a total asshole? And if you write back, is it delicate and walking-on-eggshells, like how they think about you, or is it normal and casual and brisk, like how you think about them? What's the balance? Because you don't want to be outright cruel - whether or not you might have been, nearly a decade ago - but you don't quite want a new correspondent, either? Here's what i can't say:

Dear R, I had fun at event X, and am glad to hear that you did too! And now, i have a great icebreaker at Formal Events Where I Don't Know Anyone. You know, "This Reminds me of the Time..." lol. (And for what it's worth, i quite honestly don't think you did anything i'd need to forgive you for.) Remember that movie we saw - they just made a sequel, the little girl grows up and kills herself. Weird, huh? Unfortunately we've reached the maximum guest list for the wedding (big family + small space = aargh!) but say hello to your friends for me. It's a little creepy that you referred to event X as "the best weekend of your life." Good to hear from you again, though. Regards, liz

Because, callous and unfeeling and trample, trample, trample. Only i don't want to encourage this, either. Cuz, dude, i'm happy. I'm getting married. And this kid has nothing to do with it. Nothing, like, on par with a butterfly flapping its wings in M100. Hello, little butterfly. Nice to know you exist. Carry on with your life however you have been living it. Don't mind me.

Labels: internet, people

had a job interview.

Rocked said job interview.

Having the right outfit totally helps. [/ditz]

i want, i want, i want. Step back and breathe. So then. If i had a different job my pants would last longer - no more acid holes. Stupid lab.

Labels: work

drag queens vs. male belly dancers:

drag queens win. At everything.

Labels: people

what would dooce do?

grrrrr.

well, let's get it all over with. i lie to my mother.

what do i lie about?

she said, Liz, do you pluck your eyebrows?

and i said, No.

My answer is not going to change, ever.

Even if she finds the tweezers next time she visits.

Hungarian eyebrows are like Brooke Shields on amphetamines - it was Brooke Shields, right? maybe? - all over the place, growing and sprawling and huge, taking over entire faces. Mine are not going to be that way, not ever. It would make me look like a homeless person. Does my face trump my heritage? Hell yes, it does. Am i ever going to tell her? No. And the next time she brings it up? (Because she knows. Even if i didn't suspect she comes here, she knows, because hungarian eyebrows are dominant, and my eyebrows are normal and my brother's are insane) I'm going to lie. Again. No, they look like this anyway, Mom. Honest. If my brother asked what was up with his eyebrows, now, i might tell him to get a regular wax and a trim, at least before job interviews. Not that i'd bring it up.

Since this is my blog, it has things that make sense in my head, and not things that are required to make sense in anyone else's head. It doesn't include things that make other people pissy or stressed or anything else. it is mine. It is not here for any of you. If my readership goes down because i consider this mine and am selfish about it, so.be.it. There will never be a guest blogger, not ever. And unavoidably, someday, sooner or later, someday i will say something bitchy about you (if you build it, they will come + if i build it, i will say bitchy things because that is what a nonprofessional blog is entirely for = if they come, they will see them). this is mine. it is my space to figure out how my head works because it is cheaper than therapy and writing is good. i am letting you read it because maybe i'm not a psych major, but ...oh, hell. i don't know why i'm letting you read it.

Remember this is their outlet. They may not want you to read certain things they might write about you or others you care about, in order to spare your feelings, avoid drama or maintain their privacy.

Labels: health

"The White House did not say why the president was unaware of the plans his administration announced just a week earlier."

i'm sorry, what?

Labels: politics

so there is a Thing, more specifically, a drag show formal event, on saturday. And the girl who scored me a ticket isn't, um, formal. And buying shoes for other people (and earrings for other people) is fun. we went to the mall (i know, ugh, the mall) at lunch. i ought to be a personal shopper. but. so. this friend. person. is the most high-maintenance friend i've ever had. and i'm sort of wondering if i like it or not. that i like her, yes, she's very nice, but i'm not sure if i like it. that could we just chill for five minutes? and. i think she may have noticed this. and i'm not sure what i can do about it.

i'm also not sure what to call her, here, because there's already a regularly appearing J. And Irregularly Appearing J, or New J, doesn't have the same ring. why do so many peoples' names start with J? God, this is hard.

so this is a work-friend now. and has been seen a couple of times outside work, sure. And i'm going, obviously, to the drag show with a group which includes her (since, well, she scored us all the tickets, right?). And i'm just wondering, now, i can put a stop on this. i can say No. (preemptive shh!) And, as a high-maintenance person, she'd be hurt. But there would be fewer eventual crises for me. but if i don't keep some sort of limit in place then she's eventually going to wonder (and hyperventilate-over and way-too-over-analyze) what happened to my cell phone. right? because she's fun, but she's exhausting. i can't be on call for that all the time. but when i say - and someday i will - no, i don't have to tell you everything that is going through my head every minute of the damn day, and no, i'm going to do this tonight, and no, you can't come with me, and no, i don't care what you're doing tonight, because give me some space, girl - do i say that now, or later? and it'll end up being later, of course, but it'll be worse when (if) it is. Because it might not happen. i might be able to keep it contained. (penny for your thoughts? shut the fuck up and leave me alone, are my thoughts.) sigh ... only that's not what i want either. you don't. get. to be. my best. friend. you can be my friend. but could we let it just be for a while?

*stuffs budding friendship back into the box it came in*

Labels: drama

attn. all:

sean has a blog.

Thank you.

Labels: blogging

i think, this time, i may have actually broken something. Because. Now, i can move one of my little toes in a way in which (a) i don't think i could move it before, or anyway i never noticed i could, and (b) i can't do with the other little toe, no matter how hard i try. i can make it go sort of sideways and crooked and sort of lie down flat on the ground, rotated ninety degrees from all my other toes. It doesn't stay like that at least, and it doesn't really hurt, but i don't think it's supposed to do that either. Only it has these sharp little twinges that are very owy once in a while. Only it's not actually broken, because i can walk on it (most of the time, almost all the time, really) and it's not all bruised up like they say broken toes are on the internet. It doesn't look any different from the other little toe. But it moves in this new, very sideshow way, rotating, like i have an elbow-joint instead of a toe-joint, and what does that suggest? ... With the isolated stabbing pains...

hm. Meh. so it's taped to the one next to it. At least.

Labels: health

Brother Neutron Bomb of Serenity notes for the record that he does not have a moral code but is nevertheless a good person, and Unexalted Leader Garrote of Forgiveness stipulates that Brother Neutron Bomb of Serenity is a good person, and this is to be reflected in the minutes.

Labels: politics

that i am anyway. stodgy old recessional music. Because i am totally, completely obsessed, now.

• just like heaven, by the cure (probably love song would work better, eh?)
• sublime's what i got
• lust for life, iggy pop
• elvis costello, she
• rolling stones. not fade away? nearness of you? everybody needs someone to love? holy shit, the stones once covered the temptations' my girl. hmm....
• that song that goes "Some people call me maurice"
• ripple
• sugar magnolia, cuz, why the hell not?
• the beatles: all you need is love, or ob.la.di, or when i'm 64, or honeymoon song which is pretty but i have no. idea. what it sounds like
• Queen, crazy little thing called love
• i'm a believer, the monkees (whee!)
• van morrison's brown eyed girl
• ehh, there's got to be other decent stuff out there. Or not.

Labels: wedding

"My great-grandmother and your great-great-grandfather were lovers," she is said to have purred. "So how about it?" yay! go fred and gladys! whee! wonder how the Q. is as a MIL. eeeurgh.

Labels: wedding

TMI. very TMI. just to warn you. but. so. and then you see a whole crowd of them get together to kill one of these - warming-up little rat snake, nonvenemous, maybe four feet long, not too big (whatever they tell you, it wasn't "huge"), just wants to be on its way, but is accidentally on the sidewalk at work. With a two-by-four and a hoe. And the poor thing. And it's having twisty painful death throes. And suddenly i'm not so happy about having my window. And i just had lunch, for crying out loud. Let it be, scoop it up and put it in the field, whatever. But no. I say again. With a hoe. *gouges eyes out*

Labels: texas

so took the car to the people for its forty thousand mile checkup ... and they checked everything and had the tires rotated and the brake fluid done whatever is done to brake fluid and oil changes and spark plugs and a new coolant temperature sensor and a new hazard switch and a nice carwash at the end of it all. but. now, when i turn on the turn signals, instead of going clllicky clllicky clllicky clllicky clllicky all loud and solid, it sounds like the turn signal in m's car, ticktockticktockticktock. and this was very disorienting. one has to check the first few times that the turn signal lights are going on and that this is what it's supposed to be doing. but i can't figure out why the noise of it would change? they didn't replace the little lightbulbs in the dash? and if it's only the switch of the hazard lights that got replaced? and it's nothing that anyone else is ever going to notice. but the old turn signal sound was sort of familiar. and this one is more on the jarring side for now. the What cd do i have in? side. the Who is this idiot on the radio? side. It's very different.

Labels: emptor

(1) i have a new username there, and it is bloggerbazil, and please add me to your friends; and
(2) i hate LJ. because all of my usernames are taken. those bastards! and
(3) i have no idea how to join communities or anything? what are these? who is in them? is there one for poho? wtf????
(4) wait. i can get calvin and hobbes? i can get calvin and hobbes! hmm...

Labels: blogging

it's a gorgeous day. Again. every year it is. for fourteen years in a row, and counting, wherever i am, today, it's always beautiful and the sky is always that kind of blue. world, you rotten bitch. could you possibly rub it in any more?

and (don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world) it's not like i actually have it bad. compared to. and what about. but i don't know if that makes it better or worse. if i can look at the issues i have and they're dwarfed, miniscule, not-even-a-speedbump, almost lucky little things, (what do you mean, that's it?) next to all these other things that other people have, should i not be feeling bad about this? do i get to compare my little neurosis to real tragedy? because it's not little to me, yet, ever, but if i said it, it's so, like, you're not over that yet? and this is what a blog is for. yes. when it's mine, yes. but then, don't worry about me, i've been doing this for over a decade, now. oh, world, you stinking fucking whore, all decked out with your birds and flowers and sunshine and new-growth and merry little breezes, i hate you sometimes.

Labels: people

TGIF. *perk* plus, found address for the Last Remaining Cousins. important-er people that still remain to find address for: FJ, DJ. so. close. to. done. and then, on to the next weekly crisis: TX location! whee! why don't they have sitcoms about wedding planners, you wonder? because this little bout of manic ridiculosity, this is real life, who needs writers? ... and i'm off to make two hundred little glass magnets! The Parent has this crazy concern that since they're not all identical, people will wander off with dozens of them apiece and not everyone will get one ... the hell with that. but Parent is getting further magnetic options made to allay Parent fears. *zoom*

Labels: wedding

i've never got spam in portugese before (thank you, babelfish.altavista.com). but what the hell? do people actually write these? and. my favorite part? is "the suécos are excellent the new DVD of the Ace of Base? Thanks to the God, not."

Its room was full of posters among others things of the Michael Jackson. Its substances preferred in the school were history, languages and biology. Malin is super poliglota, it speaks: Suéco (its native language), English, German, Spaniard, Latin and special pro Rô (I love oxê). Ps.: "Xê goes sees! It gives a biburrow " 31/Out - Anniversary of the Linn (who) Full name: Malin Sofia Katarina Berggren. Nicknames: Linn, Linnie and Malin Stalin. Date of birth: 31 of October of 1970 Place of birth: 31 of October of 1970 Place of birth: Gotemburgo, Sweden Boyfriend, fiancé or husband: nobody knows of nothing in me To the afternoon I taste, because I seem a human being." First Kiss: "I had 13 years and way. It was so happy and proud who wanted to give for it all its things. It liked to sing and its grandmother taught it to touch piano, Linn also learned flute and violin. It was an intelligent child very, wise person the alphabet and could read advanced words with 4 years and was with a stranger in one boate. Very frightful." First time: "a girl" Malin Never asks to this pra was the second child to be born in the Berggren family, when its brother, Jonas, had 3 years and way. When Linn had 18 months, if it became the sister oldest of the Jenny. It liked to sing and its grandmother taught it to touch piano, Linn also learned flute and violin. It was an intelligent child very, wise person the alphabet and could read advanced words with 4 years and was with a stranger in one boate. Very frightful." First time: "a girl" Malin Never asks to this pra was the second child to be born in the Berggren family, when its brother, Jonas, had 3 years and way. When Linn had 18 months, if it became the sister oldest of the Jenny. It liked to play with Jenny to take account as if it was a doll. It made it to sing to sleep and sang pra Jenny, and when its irmãzinha cried, Malin took care of of it until stopping to attend! They attend! They laugh very! E in the end it makes plus a propaganda mount. E one of them was: "They want used parts of car? Its necessary car of cheap parts? All to the Old Iron of the Airton go " Irrrrrrrrrrtooooo! Hahahaha Kisses! My will is to erase this below my column. It has bad fluids. I do not only erase due to innumerable comments. Taking off the friends and love, the remaining portion tá everything one bosta! How lastimável it is my life! It register here the part of my mine... I tried to like some woman but the man attracts me much more... Staff forgives for the evil smells mine... and badly halito mine, I promise now from improving this side therefore and badly halito mine, I promise now from improving this side therefore and my new friend I will be the woman entaum.. tenhu that to be more vain person with my hygiene. Therefore I ask for to all the FRIENDS and a little sad, therefore he passed for the head of all to help me to pass this email why I decided to assume of veis my feminine side... or either I am gay!!!!!!!!!!!! I find that everybody ja distrusted ja... but now I am assuming therefore I am similar of one face therefore I ask for to all never more fedido floor... E nor with bafo of ounce... Voces does not know as I am feeling with this decisao well... Nao I have email of all with dark eyeglasses, when it went. This made with that all were a little and divided the main voices with its voice in 1996 and that it is happy for continuing in the band as tecladista. Linnie still said that it does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have noçã! The program of it basically has singers cafolas that they sing in the House of the Settler (that cafola) while passes millions of propagandas in the screen. Later it it shows to the son pelotinha circling with suits of anjinhos, with wing and everything. Sample its older greasy-pelotudo son and says "somebody wants to namorar my son" with that voice rouca. Vehjam the hair of it!!!!! ÓHHH! He is very cafola! It records the program in the house of Robson (also the Chester) and Reveilão(c) in the Beach that was all wonderful one. Starting with the attempted against one of day 11 of September of 2001 in the two towers. Yesterday I was attending to the woman entaum.. tenhu that to be more vain person with my hygiene. Therefore I ask for to all the FRIENDS and a little sad, therefore he passed for the head of all with dark eyeglasses, when he went. This made with that all were a little behind the band because had 2 girls (Linn and Anna-Karin) and 22 boys! It felt the queen, because moreover, it was blond and the boys adored. Linn was gotten passionate for Michael Jackson. He was a great fan of it. Its room was full of posters among others things of the Michael Jackson. He was a great fan of it. Its room was full of posters among others things of the Michckson. It was a great exposition of its image and wanted to leave that Jenny had the experience that it wanted to be a little sad, therefore passed for the head of all to help me to pass this email for other friends mine so that they n if assusten when to see transformed me with mine I mine... E nor with bafo of ounce... Voces does not know as I am feeling with this decisao well... Nao I have email of I ask for to all never more fedido floor... E I promise to all mine probelmas... In relation to the year end, he was all wonderful one. Starting with the attempted against one of day 11 of September of 2001 in the two towers. Yesterday I was attending to the woman more cafola of Piracicaba in the TV Cafolario Side. The name of the presenter is Irene that has phobia to fly. The entrepreneur of them, Lasse, in said them that the fear of Linn to fly got worse still more with the Christmas in the house of the Cláudia and the Carmen alone in suruba! (hahahaha) I was Never fan of them, but new musiquinha is lindinha. E the video then! He is one of the videos fofos than already vi. The Cardigans: Obs.: I do not know pq, but the suécos are excellent the new DVD of the Ace of Base? Thanks to the God, not. It explained this in some interviews that it had. In one of the interviews, it she explained that she had great problem with its voice in 1996 and that she is happy for continuing in the band as tecladista. Linnie still said that it does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have guilt! Insane person does not have plans to leave the band. Pra to complete, Linn is of those people whom the program in the house of Robson has (also the Chester) and Reveilão(c) in the Beach who was everything of good (also the Chester) and the time all sonhadora physical Imperfection: "Of morning I not Characteristic taste of nothing: It can very be stubborn and the time all sonhadora physical Imperfection: "Of morning I not taste of nothing in me To the afternoon I taste, because I seem a human being." First Kiss: "I had 13 years and way. It was so happy and proud who wanted to give for it all its things. It liked to sing and its grandmother taught it to touch piano, Linn also learned flute and violin. It was an intelligent child very, wise person the alphabet and could read advanced words with 4 years and was with a stranger in one boate. Very frightful." First time: "a girl" Malin Never asks to this pra was the second child to be born in the Berggren family, when its brother, Jonas, had 3 years and were with a stranger in one boate. Very frightful." First time: "a girl" Malin Never asks to this pra was the second child to be born in the Berggren family, when its brother, Jonas, had 3 years and way. It was so happy and proud who wanted to give for it all its things. It liked to play with Jenny to take account as if it was a doll. It made it to sing to sleep and sang pra Jenny, and when its irmãzinha cried, Malin took care of of it until stopping to attend! They attend! They laugh very! E in the end it makes plus a propaganda mount. E one of them was: "They want used parts of car? Its necessary car of cheap parts? All to the Old Iron of the Airton go " Irrrrrrrrrrtooooo! Hahahaha Kisses! My will is to erase this below my column. It has bad fluids. I do not only erase due to innumerable comments. Taking off the friends and love, the remaining portion tá everything one bosta! How lastimável it is my life! It register here the part of my mine... I tried to like some woman but the man attracts me much more... Staff forgives for the evil smells mine... and my new friend I will be the woman more cafola of Piracicaba in the TV Cafolario Side. The name of the presenter is Irene that has the program in the house of Robson (also the Chester)! Kisses to that they compriendam me and please c do not move away from min! Debtor for coompreençao..

Labels: internet

*not very factual on motorcycles either

:anmut: :annika: :chin: :dooce: :ewok mama: :food: :little frog school: :lj: :longform: :low odysseys: :natalya: :rich: :salon: :slate: :this is how: :unique yn:



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