scrawls
still cheaper than therapy*


4.3.10
i write half of something, it dwindles, ... if i follow a thought to the end, i don't want to. i see where they go, like cars on a distant highway. i let them go, on into the darkness ... i look at my fingers, at my hands, they are shaking, my fingers are shaking. i worry that this will sound like i'm depressed, i'm not, i don't think i am, and i think that counts for a lot.

I write half of something, i have no follow-through, i drift. i only have beginnings, not even a middle, no center, i shrink to nothing. no momentum, just the erosive wind, down the mountain, from the sea, off the desert.

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scrawled @ 15:10

Blogger Rama said...4/3/10 18:22 ...
That... sums up my feeling on a lot of days, for various reasons. Poetic. 

Blogger Crystal T. said...4/3/10 23:35 ...
Maybe you are lonely or feeling like you don't have enough of an anchor? Those things sound like depression a lot of times. In any case, I can certainly imagine where you are at...I've been there. If you don't have connections, make them. If you don't have an anchor, get one. It's hard to live and be all-responsible without those things. 

Blogger Edna said...8/3/10 00:45 ...
You have a tremendous ability to express your self! Aunt Edna
www.EdnaMcGrew.com 

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