scrawls.

scrawls

still cheaper than therapy*

25.6.08

i should have said something at the time

but i didn't and i should have, i should have, except my German is not good enough to curse out a construction worker. Nowhere near. And if they were talking to me i could just ignore it anyway, like i always do, even though i should probably say something every single time, assholes, and honestly if i even noticed it any more i would? Is it sad that i am so used to being catcalled that i don't even notice? Fucked up fucking patriarchy, eh? But now you know the Turks have just scored over the Germans - with half the red team missing and the other half hurt - and thinking about it i kind of want them to win. Now. Because walking into work this morning i happened to arrive at the same time as one of the IT guys and he's kind of dark skinned, i think he's Indian or something, and by Indian, i mean subcontinent, with an elegant and many-syllabled name, so, yeah, fairly dark skinned. And they're building a new building at work and they're out paving the patio or some goddamned thing and one of the construction workers yelled at him and his face went dark and he walked faster in and i should have said something. I know which one it was. I think. It probably ruined his day (if, well, he's anything like me) and he's not even Turkish (on top of which, he's quite a nice guy and very helpful with all the IT things, especially for being new). And it might be just because the construction worker is some Aryan douchebag and the Turks are playing Germany tonight (Germany's tied it up, it'll be a decent game then) but i should have said something. And with the surprise and the lack of German skillz it was immediately too late. And what can i say? Du racist fucking schwein, how ... really ... what do you say? I know what i am going to say the next time someone catcalls me: My dog died this morning, Mein Hund ist heute Morgen tod. Immediately humanizing, completely depressing, will make anybody feel like the utter worthless heap of shit they ought to. And maybe i think it is perfect just because there was so much damn country music in Texas and i need something shorter and possibly less, well, snotty than i was drunk the day my Ma got out of prison. But i can't say that for someone else. And, um, when i do notice myself being catcalled, i forget it entirely in that angry red dark. Because i am angry. I want to hurt him. And while i like to think of myself as being nonviolent, there is not a lot of graffiti in Vienna, but a good percentage of what there is is "Kill All Racists" and "Nazis Must Die" and it kind of doesn't offend me at all. Advocating blood like that probably ought to, but nope. That graffiti is earned.

haHa! Apparently one says, greizbiereinbaumholerstein, though i'm spelling it wrong, which means, approximately, or as far as i can make it out, go fuck a hole in a dead tree. Awesome!

Labels: vienna

scrawled @ 20:09