scrawls.

scrawls

still cheaper than therapy*

21.12.07

he would get along so well with My Rhinoceros! Dear Internet, you are a failure sometimes: where is the auto ride verse? And what is this with the dancing and lazy verses? so. The Slightly More Definitive My Rhinoceros:

(apparently, by Edward Lipton)

chorus:

My rhinoceros, my rhinoceros,
He has such a beautiful smile
My rhinoceros, my rhinoceros,
but he smiles only once in a while

verses i remember:

My rhinoceros loves doughnuts,
he eats them night and morn
but he does't have any pockets,
so he carries them on his horn

My rhinoceros is silly
When we go for an auto ride
if he doesn't want to go with us
he runs to his room and he hides.

My rhinoceros gets dirty
and we have to tell him to scrub
But there is no room for the water
when he gets into the tub

My rhinoceros gets tired
and has to lie down for a nap
But you have to tell him a story
and let him sit on your lap

More verses i never knew:

My rhinoceros is Lazy
He wont clean up his room,
My mother says to tell him
that he better do it soon

My rhinoceros is is happy
he loves to dance all day
when he's dancing in my room
I stay out of his way

edit:more:extras

My Rhinoceros gets lazy; it can happen most anywheres,
But often it's at bedtime, till we carry her up all the stairs.

My Rhinoceros hates yard work; she shunned it since she was born,
Except for just one type of chore: plowing up weeds with her horn.

My Rhinoceros loved TV, especially the "Zoo Parade,"
But now she runs to the radio and tunes to Lake Wobegon's charade.

My Rhinoceros hates school work; she can't even stand the joint.
In spite of deep explanations, she never quite gets the point.

My Rhinoceros loves cooking. She loves to create a soufflé.
She serves it on beautiful China, then dances 'round shouting "Ole!"

My Rhinoceros is playful, loves wrestling and clowning and stuff.
She loves to scare all the neighbors by putting on her boxing gloves.

My Rhinoceros loves opera; Puccini and Wagner and such.
She's such a substantial Brunhilde, but she sings the libretto in Dutch!

My Rhinoceros loves swimming and diving is her great forte,*
But when she jumps in from the platform, the water all splashes away.

My Rhinoceros does Yoga, the lotus position and all.
It's impressive when she does a head stand,
but get out of the way when she falls!

My Rhinoceros loves children; she's into Tae Kwan Do and mime;
When she starts into her juggling, She can levitate three at a time.

My Rhinoceros loves politics, thinks taxes and war are unfair.
One day she'll be throwing her weight around and running for office somewhere.

My Rhinoceros went camping; she needed no coaxing or push,
But then she tried hiding from foxes behind a small mulberry bush.

My Rhinoceros loves CNN; she wants to keep up with the news.
One day I saw her on "Larry King" discussing the films of Tom Cruise.

Labels: internet, media

scrawled @ 12:06