scrawls.

scrawls

still cheaper than therapy*

7.6.06

no. no. no. no. no. not that vienna.

it is absolutely astonishing how little americans know about basic geography. i keep saying i'm moving to vienna or to austria and they have no idea where it is. they don't know they speak german. if i say i'm moving to vienna, they ask if i'm going to get to work by gondola. when i say i'm moving to vienna, austria, they ask, oh then, if i'm going to have a kangaroo for a pet. and that's if they realize i'm even leaving the continental united states, which doesn't always happen. oh, europe? why didn't you say so? when i very clearly did, because when i say Vienna, i mean i'm moving to fucking Vienna. THE VIENNA. The one that does not require qualifiers. not vienna, virginia, not vienna, georgia, not vienna, tennessee, not vienna, michigan, not vienna, wisconsin, not vienna, iowa, not vienna, maine, or vienna, illinois, vienna, louisiana, vienna, west virginia, vienna, maryland, vienna, new york, or vienna, missouri. i mean THE fucking VIENNA. the ORIGINAL. the IMPORTANT one. thank you very much. no, it is not a suburb of washington. no, it is not in the finger lakes. no, it was not greatly affected by hurricane Katrina. GOD, you all SUCK. ignorant bastards. but all you can do is very carefully say, no, Vienna, Austria, which is part of the European Union, because it is in Europe, which is not part of the United States. and that just makes them confused. maybe this is why people don't mind war: because these other places don't really exist if you don't know where they are. if one has no concept of the grace and lightness that is Muslim architecture, how can one care if it is destroyed? if one cannot begin to realize that there are people living, people with families and grandparents and little kids and happy cousins, out in the sand and the dust, can one really be expected to care if they are hurt? what is wrong with the educational system in this country when a mother tells her daughter that people in one of the largest, most beautiful, most cultured and nuanced and historic cities in Europe live in teepees? is it any heartbreaking surprise that people hate americans?

on the other hand, when someone does get it right, and i say i'm moving to vienna and they get all big-eyed, i greatly enjoy getting to say Yes, That Vienna.

in other news, i recently got to say in perfect context, no, you can't see uranus with the naked eye. You need a mirror. tags:vienna

scrawled @ 18:16