scrawls
still cheaper than therapy*


i meant to mention this yesterday.

driving home is fascinating - i go on the highway and so i go not really a long way, but long enough, so at work, it's raining, sure, but then i'm driving and i get to the highway and am driving towards my house and there's this big black line of clouds. between me and my house. in an absolutely straight line across the sky. and they're very tall and very dense and look like some entirely fakey thing from an untalented and visionless painter. and i'm driving towards them and they keep getting bigger, and this perfectly straight line goes all the way across the sky, and they're very tall and lumpy and intimidating and if there was ever a time for a person to be claustrophobic in the great outdoors, this is it, because they're hanging about ten feet above the car. and i've seen perfectly straight lines of clouds going all the way across the sky but driving into them and under them and knowing exactly when the instant was that i went under them ... was oddly ... unnerving.

and of course the dogs were outside and Soaked.

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texan foibles and ensuing hilarity
it's always kind of fun, in a scha-den-freud-ey kind of way, to watch those silly people with the giant trucks try to park them in the little mini-parking-lot. Most parking spaces around here are oversized just to fit them - but not all. and there's this person in a big gray (though i think they call it "silver") f350 going back, and forth, and back and forth again, and going up on the kerb a bit, and going back and forth a little bit more, and almost hitting that honda on the far side, and then back and forth again, and then giving up entirely and going to find another parking space.

Bunch of savages in this town.

also, my boss, though i doubt he's a republican, is ... well, silly. he got all excited because the president said he wanted to go to mars. i pointed out that whenever the president gets happy about a particular thing (i.e. no child left behind, social security, homeland security, firemen, the environment, veterans health care, et c.), the president eviscerates funding for that particular program or cause - so the boss, in wanting a functional space program, should be seriously concerned that the president has noticed nasa at all. but the boss doesn't believe anything i say in the first place, so it's not really a new thing or surprising at all. But it's dumb all the same.

Also, those crazy people are still going on with the 263-mile canoe race, even though it may very well be wet and floody and miserable. which means i'm still going on with the canoe race, even though it may very well be wet and floody and miserable, though i reserve the right to go home and take a hot bath at any time.

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ok everyone FINE already
last updated: october 20, 2005

Last movie you saw in a theater? the forty year old virgin, which was better than i thought it would be, but i had very low expectations.
What book are you reading now? Mason & Dixon, by thomas pynchon. it's funny.
Worst feeling in the world? knowing that yes, that's the alarm, i have to get up now, bastard
First thing you think upon waking? fuck, do i have to get up?
Favorite fast food place? heberts' cajun shack
Future offsprings' names? i have no idea. i didn't know we'd name the dogs what we did until we met them - "emily" was never on any sort of short list until she had those big brown eyes - and denali, i have no idea where we got that from. Other than the bar. And the whole Alaska - wolf - puppy - thing.
Do you have any pets? Yes, two dogs, of the medium-sized and fuzzy yet poorly defined breed that likes to destroy newspapers. see above.
Were you named after anyone? several aunts and great-aunts, queen elizabeth, saint elizabeth, and possibly others i'm not aware of. The good thing, my parents claim, about naming me something ridiculously common is that everyone thinks you're named after them.
If I had a lot of money I would ... quit my damn job. And buy a yacht.
Do you drive fast? probably.
Do you sleep with a stuffed animal? no, too risky - the dogs would think it was for them. But the dogs themselves are on the bed a lot, and they're pretty well fed.
Storms - cool or scary? depends. is my car in danger of getting dents? is my roof in danger of leaking / falling in? Otherwise, cool. (i have a new roof now, so it is in very little danger of falling in.)
What was your first car? my '02 jetta. I love my car. i would never, ever, ever reccomend that anyone i remotely like, however, buy a jetta. Ever.
What car do you drive now? See above. Except when it's not working.
Favorite drink? Biere de Mars from the New Belgium Brewing Co. in Colorado
If I had more time I would... find a place that teaches swing lessons nearby
Do you eat the stems on broccoli? i suppose, why wouldn't i?
What color would you like to dye your hair? meh. maybe a darker brown.
Name all the places you have lived: devine "lived." batavia, ny; binghamton, ny; poughkeepsie, ny; beloit, wi; columbus, oh; college station, tx; bryan, tx
Glass - half empty or half full? mmm. Either. Both. Nobody is allowed to know this one!
Favorite sport to watch? bullfighting. i'm bloodthirsty.
A nice thing about whoever sent this to you. i miss you. But many people have sent me this, so that's a little general.
What is under your bed? dog hair. And probably a dog. Underbed storage boxes containing sheets, blankets, and sweaters that we don't need because we live in freaking texas.
Toilet paper - over or under? why does this matter?
Morning person or night owl? Night owl, but i increasingly have to get up early.
What time did you get up this morning? Seven fifty. Ish.
Over easy, or sunny side up? over easy, but only just.
Favorite place to relax? on the river? maybe? or in the papasan. Or on the deck.
Favorite pie? that raspberry that chef p made in college. mmmm!
What do you miss most? What a depressing fucking question. honestly. who made this shit up? why do you want to know that? why can't we talk about something nice for once? no, no, you want the OCEAN OF FUCKING DESPAIR, do you? well, i'm not telling you about it. but i miss george, too. and billy and emily. and all my grandparents. and my uncle. and my cousin-once-removed and my great-uncle. and kat. and .. see? DEPRESSING FUCKING QUESTION. and i'm not even coming CLOSE to the ocean of fucking despair, here, this is just a little half-ounce of misery.

How is the weather right now? Hot. Damn hot. Remeber that monologue in good morning vietnam?
What color pants are you wearing right now? jeans.
What color is your bathroom? PURPLE.
What are you listening to right now? the fridge is humming
What color of underwear you wearing right now? i think it's blue ... but at work, i'm not going to check
What are you looking forward to? well, tomorrow is friday.
Anything new and exciting? i'm thisclose to being done redoing the poor, sad, ex-mauve-brick fireplace. it is so good that the fireplace will not be mauve brick any more. A mauve brick fireplace is a terrible thing to see. (well, a mauve brick is a terrible thing to see in the first place, and an entire fireplace of mauve bricks is an eyesore and has made several people go blind.)
What was the last thing you ate? Cheerios.
Last person you talked to on the phone? m.
Do you like the person who sent you this? a lot of people have sent me this. I like all the ones i can remember. but there are other people on the internet that have similar things posted, and i'm sure i don't like all of them. i'm picky. Most recently, though, yes.
Who is most likely to respond? people who already have sent me at least one
Who is least likely to respond? all those lovely people who don't send forwards!
Do you want everyone to respond? Ha, don't make me laugh. sure. whatever. that's why i have comments! aha!
Name the person you are sending this to that is the farthest away: ...the internet goes everywhere.

Favorite foods? behold...the power of cheese...
Least favorite foods? Having eaten jellyfish, i really can't reccomend it. I'm also not a fan of the chocolate tacos (chicken mole is just weird, man). Probably wouldn't reccomend rooster testicles to anyone but very seasoned weird eaters. Things i can reccomend, having eaten, include (but are not limited to, and these are just the things i can think of offhand): raw eel, cow brains, octopus, frog legs, alligator, liverwurst, venison jalapeno sausage, buffalo, fish-berry jelly, tofu, and stinky Korean pickled cabbage. Someday i aspire to locate, identify, and eat blood sausage. I will not eat grits because i cannot identify them.
Favorite cuisine? I have recently learned: Don't come between me and my pasta. Don't.
Favorite chip flavor? Sour cream and onion is pretty reliable across brands, i suppose.
Favorite thing? many things are good for many different things. i have a nice fleecy blanket, but it's not very good for, you know, making fresh pasta or something, but then the cappucino machine isn't very portable, and .. oh, i know. the portable camping blow-up mattress :) man, that thing has changed my life
Favorite brand of clothing? seriously, who came up with this question? because, you're weird. in high school i had a poncho that was made in bangladesh. it had no brand. i'm sure it was made by a five-year-old that's probably dead by now and has no fingers left. so that's what we're going with, here.
Favorite type of movie? Sci-fi dystopias. Particularly, noir-y sci-fi dystopias. Matrix, Dark City, Metropolis, 12 Monkeys, Brazil, Blade runner, Mad Max, 28 Days Later, Strange Days, Logan's Run, ...
Favorite sound? what a weird quetion.
Favorite sport to play? um... Ultimate.
Favorite season? fall
Favorite board game? i think really we play ... oh, what is it ... cranium more than anything else. but i've never really liked it. i can whistle well when i know the names of tunes, though.
Favorite magazine? i still really, really miss George. But Playboy and i have almost exactly the same politics - our only point of disagreement is that Hef likes his wimmin a little skinnier than I do. his aren't curvy enough.
Favorite smells? lavender. sandalwood. citrusy undertones. paprika.
Favorite month? october
Favorite day of the week? Saturday. With sunday and thursday doing pretty well too.
Favorite day of the year? see, this is never something i've really thought about - what's the point? i'tll only happen once a year, anyway, and you can't hope for it to come sooner or more often, as you could with, say, a favorite restaurant or something. Ah, hell. let's say.. aah, fuck it.
Favorite holiday? see, this is the same issue as the previous question - and it's all tied up with religious institutions and the way your family celebrates things. i think i liked thanksgiving, this year - m's family is so norman rockwell, and my stuffing turned out, and - Oh, never mind, i liked Boxing day. we had a barbecue.

If you were a crayon what color would you be? oh, brown.
Hugs or Kisses? kisses. Many kisses.
Relationships or One Night Stands? relationships. Relationship.
Buttered, Plain, or Salted Popcorn? now that i think about it, none of that crap. Popcorn is gross and gets stuck in your teeth and reeks like hell ... gimme some chocolate with my movie, and some sour patch kids
Cats or dogs? dogs.
What is your least favorite thing about yourself? i am jack's desperate need for global adoration.
Hair color? Why would i tell you this if you don't already know?
Eye color? Stalker. Ass. Go away.
Do you wear contacts? No.
Scary movies or happy endings? Scary movies with happy endings. J-horror freaks me out, but i'm always left wanting more.
Summer or winter? A nice variety of both.
What is your favorite dessert? That strawberries and caramel and whipped cream thing from the bodega in northgate. Tres leches isn't too bad either. Anything with dairy and fruit is my friend, basically. Or chocolate.
What did you watch last night on TV? We do have a television, but it doesn't really get used much. we turned it on once a week or two ago to see if the cable was working.
Rolling Stones or Beatles? Stones. By just the smallest margin.
Furthest you've been from home? Paris. Maybe Hungary. I'm not sure which is farther in terms of mileage. But in terms of Being Home, texas can still be a pretty long way sometimes.
What did you want to be when you were little? Happy.
What are you now? Yep.
Do you have a special talent? If by "special" you mean "rides the short bus," then no, i don't have a special talent.
What is your ringtone? Beep beep beep. Or, Low rider.

Do you like it when your friends write back? yes. what am i going to say - no?
How much do you love your job (1-10)? 7
What are you doing tonight? having a beer. Dunno.
Can you touch your nose with your tongue? no, but i haven't tried in a while
What color socks are you wearing? black socks, they never get dirty the longer you wear 'em the stronger they get. some times i think i should wash 'em but something inside always tells me not yet.
Coffee, or coffee ice cream? latte. Or basic cuppa coffee with two or three creamers thrown in.
Been in a car crash? some punk rear-ended my jetta. bastard.
How many keys on your key ring? six or seven, i think
Can you juggle? not for very long
Red or white wine? red .. though messina hof makes a suprisingly good rose. that reminds me, i need to tell mike we're having a hottub party at his place again
What is your bedtime? probably after 11:00 or so
What do you do when you're bored? complain
Where do you see yourself in ten years? not in texas
What did you do for your last birthday? we went to WalMart to prepare for the Hurricane that (a) missed us entirely and (b) caused all our grass to die.
Do you carry a donor card? no, i have a donor sticker.
Lifetime goals? to have a happy medium.
Have you got any nicknames? umm, liz? and i'm thebazil (which is mostly, for those of you that aren't very good at keeping up, elizabeth backwards) on the internet, but only because there are other bazils. and i've been zylle and zil and zyl (alts on liz backwards, dumbass) and bluej (i like them, they've got nerve) and aequinox (since my birthday is one) and carina (eta carina is my favorite nebula) and ... oh, but those were ages ago. that's enough answer. Moving on.
What is your middle name? My middle name is "i am very suspicious of the internet and am not, therefore, posting my real middle name on it." It's long, but not hyphenate.

What time is it: 12:28PM
Number of candles that appeared on your last cake: i don't think i've had a cake for a couple of years. Maybe 17 or so. Couldn't say. Really, it's been a while.
When is your anniversary: May.
Been to Africa: No
Loved somebody so much it made you cry: yes
Favorite Movie: i think today i'm going to pick.... big fish.
Favorite Toothpaste: there are differences between toothpastes? Ones that aren't so minty they make my eyes water, maybe.
Favorite Restaurant: dunno. i like sushi.
Favorite Flowers: gerbera daisies. Other daisies. Black-eyed susans. Chrysanthemum types, pretty much.
Favorite candy: milk chocolate. Kit kats. I hate Marzipan, though. i can eat, like, a sliver of Marzipan, because i want to like it, but it's just ... too much. i like eating little slivers of it, but maybe because i'm a masochist. Tiny little slivers.
Favorite Sesame Street Character: Cookie Monster. i met him once. he gave me a chips ahoy.
Disney or Warner Bros.: um. warner bros, i guess. Disney is too much of an adjective - all that baggage ...
Who is the last person you got email from before this: ca.
When was your last hospital visit: ages ago.
Carpet in your room? wall to wall berber. Very boring.
Have you ever been arrested: No. But. You can get anything you want in alice's restaurant. Ba da da da da da da dah...
Have you ever been convicted of a crime: No
Which single store would you choose to max out your credit card in? probably Lowes. seeing as how they have siding and garage doors and kitchen stuff and paint and fixtures and ...
Name the person that you are friends with that is the farthest away: nm, in singapore, i think, or either mp or sb teaching english in japan
Most annoying thing people ask me: when i'm having kids now that i'm married.
Most annoying thing people tell me: how i should be reproducing, already, i'm not getting any younger, now.
Thing you like least about other people: Closed-minded-ness, and yes, i realize i am a hypocrite about this. I am very closed minded about people i consider to be closed minded.
Favorite all time TV show: mmm. Tossup: either the simpsons, or the old-school black-and-white twilight zones. The ones the sci fi channel used to run marathons of on new years' eve.
Last person you went out to dinner with: m.
What you usually have for breakfast: This goes in phases - usually about two months each. i'll have cereal for a while, get bored, advance to bagels, get bored, stop having breakfast for a while, maybe have a fruit period, bits of toast, ...
The one thing you would take to a desert island: a sattelite phone? Oh, is that cheating? Who made these fucking rules?

What type of house do you live in? one that i own. Mostly brick. (Thankfully, not mauve.) Ranch.
How many rings before you answer your phone? Depends. do i know where my phone is? can i find it fast enough before it hits to voicemail?
If you could meet one person, dead or alive, who would it be? mmm. K.
If you could have any job you wanted, what would it be? travelling ..um.. food critic.
Would you go bungee jumping? nah, i'd be scared of hitting a bridge suppourt or something, you know? but skydiving, that, i've considered.
Do you type with your fingers on the right keys? i can type with one hand, too. But a little more slowly.
Favorite vacation spot? Any place where there's sand, water, and someone bringing me drinks with umbrellas in them. - got this answer from, i think, SH, and i'm keeping it
Song of the moment? Alice's Restaurant, i guess
Most recently read book? david sedaris. and kurt vonnegut before that.
Do you wish on stars? Not often enough to say 'yes,' really, but i do, so i can't really say 'no.'
What is your favorite lunch meat? i like ruben sandwiches. And fuck you, they're lunchy, what, you want me to mention some oversalted preservative-filled skinny little slice of unsatisfying overprocessed thing? Yes, i know i'm a hypocrite, we've covered that. Next.
What is your birth date? Stalker, i'm not telling you. You keep trying to slip this one in, here.
What was your most memorable birthday? Maybe the one in which i had beer poured on my head, and not by a frat boy, either.
When is your birthday? Come on, now.
What is your most embarrassing CD? Dunno. The Jewel one? Only that's not a ridiculously embarrassing CD, it's the backstory that's red-faced. But i'm not telling you the backstory, because i'm never telling anyone the backstory. Ever. No, not even you, stalker, fuck off.
Favorite CD? does the laptop with a gazillion hours of music on it count, as it is a hard "disc"? No? well, That's my answer anyway, asshat.
Do you have a journal? No, i have a blog. Duhhh.
What do you like best about yourself? The last time i answered this question, it turned out really badly, so i'm not going to answer it this time.
Do you like your handwriting? i like it sometimes. i don't like it so much after half a page of writing - i get sloppier than i really mean to.
If you were another person, would you be friends with you? i think it would probably take a while, but yeah, eventually. i'm slow to warm up to people. probably more likely i would hear something about me that i really liked, and decide that i liked me, but never actually speak up.
Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? If i'm wearing those nice tall boots, then probably. Otherwise not. who does?
What shoe size are you? umm, between 8.5 and 10, depending on the shoe. what?
Do you use sarcasm a lot? who would say yes to this question? (a) the person that does not use sarcasm a lot would say no; and (b) the person that, like me, might use rather a fair amount of sarcasm to say the least would also say, sarcastically, no, not at all, why do you ask?
Do you think that you are strong? I am unerodeable. (I am a rock. I am an island.)
What is your favorite ice cream flavor? chocolate
Red or pink? Red. Hands down.
Diamonds or pearls? Diamonds are a girl's best friend. Plus, i'm Marilyn herself for halloween this year. (M is DiMaggio.)

If you could build a house anywhere, where would it be? in a place where it's nice all summer but still snows once in a while. And is near water.
Where do you want to retire to? Any place where there's sand, water, and someone bringing me drinks with umbrellas in them.
What's your favorite article of clothing? ah, i can't decide. Anything black. Or blue. Or gray. Or brown. Those brown corduroy pants, narrow-wale, that died, junior year of college, worn out all the way through - i loved those. the brown narrow-wale corduroy pants i have now aren't quiite as good.
What's the last CD you bought? i think i bought m a jack johnson cd? i don't know. Oh, no, it was ... ahhh ... los straitjackets. Though i did purchase some Gourds on itunes.
What's more important, strength of mind or strength of body? what?!? this is turning into some new age hippy crap now - oz? is that from you?
Favorite kitchen appliance? does my wok count? how about that wood-shop-cheese-grater? ahhh, fine, the rice cooker, then.
What really makes you angry? stupid people.
What instrument would you like to learn to play? i .. um .. i like harmonicas. they're portable. you know?
Do you believe in an afterlife? i don't think so, really, no. Not like you mean it anyway.
Favorite childrens' book? paddington bear rocks my socks. Also, new favorite expression, via KML: rocks my socks.
What's your least favorite household chore? cobweb-removal. And dusting. but really they're the same thing.
If you could have one superpower, what would it be? flight!
If you have a tattoo, what is it? i have a tattoo on my lower back - see a picture here. it is based in hungarian (kalocsa-style) embroidery and has a rose, a helenium, a cornflower, and a thistle, plus some extra little flowers and leaves and such for decoration (which is an integral part of traditional kalocsa embroidery). it is specifically representational of my pre-marriage name: rose for elizabeth, helenium for my first middle name (which i will explain further in person, but not here, stalker), a cornflower for my hungarian ancestry (as opposed to the poppy i was originally thinking of which i've always associated more with hungary but i think hungarians (or at least the ones i know) resent that and associate it with non-politically correct things, but that's just a theory), and a thistle for scotland. it is too a thistle. it is in a hungarian style instead of scottish because (a) i've seen more hungarian traditional decor and we always had it around somewhere, (b) scotland is not celtic you misinformed ass, (c) i'm more connected to the hungarian side of things, as i've met more of that family / been there / like paprika, (d) i couldn't find any distinctive scottish styles of embroidery / painting / traditional decor in general, and (e) i think it's prettier. it is less specifically meaningful that marrying m and changing my name is not changing who I AM. (i am the one that i am and have been. Om, motherfucker.) when i told my mom i got a tattoo and sent her a picture of it she asked where i got the idea for it from and i said 'i googled kalocsa embroidery and found a nice doily and switched out some of the flowers' and she said 'well why couldn't you have it put on a pillow or something' and i said 'because i'm not carrying a pillow with me everywhere' and she just totally didn't get it.
What's in the trunk of your car? a folding camping chair. maybe two. a fuzzy blanket.
Was this annoying? Mildly. Yes.

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ooooohh, very exciting.

"She seemed to confirm the Half Blood Prince title on the Daily News page by adding "The HBP is neither Harry nor Voldemort," she wrote."

also there are some utterly fascinating things on jk rowling's official website.

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taking vacation: friday and monday and tuesday. Only we get monday, since it's not-quite a national holiday. going to be wet and bug-bitten and smelly and muddy and probably wet, again, and utterly beyond the reach of cell phones, and at least at times beyond the reach of radio - so that when you hit the scan button, it goes around the dial, and keeps going. i like the fact that it's entirely digital and i still call it going around the dial and everybody knows exactly what i'm talking about. going to have to tell K, who i think is coming with us, to bring cd's. not that there's much to listen to in the way of radio around here anyway - but for part of it we'll be near Austin, and that's not so bad. Everybody dance for cloudy-but-no-rain. does anybody have anti-blister tricks? anti-heat-rash tricks? oh, well.

a person we know, who i'll call Q, because it really is an initial of theirs and you don't meet many of those, has an Enemy. it wasn't scary at first - i was convinced it was because the Enemy thought Q was someone else and that as soon as the Enemy saw that it was Q who was driving that poor old car, and not this hypothetial other person, that it would all stop. also it wasn't scary at first because it was just one tire, and not all four, and he doesn't really live in the best of neighborhoods, and people can be pranksy sometimes.

Apparently not.

also, apparently, one doesn't have to do much to acquire an Enemy. so now it's freaky and creepy and scary.

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aww, who wants to see the movie about the kittens? really, anything called 'a strong tiger-centered story' ... well ... i guess it's more than zoo admission, but they're doing cute things, right? whereas at the zoo, the tiger kittens are probably always sleeping. what else does rotten tomatoes say: 'if you sided with the tiger in the sigfried and roy mauling' ... well ... but then there's this what-the-fuck - i thought having massive, dangerous pets was ... well ... disney has to get its ideas somewhere.

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i can be an idealist. i can be uncompromising. i don't need a reason to be. i don't need a license to be. and i don't need to be apologetic for it. if other people can say that i'm living in sin and shouldn't be allowed to then i can say that i think everyone, bar none, should have food to eat and shoes to wear and a roof to sleep under. i think if we had osama in a little concrete box without windows we could keep him there and feed him and give him running water and a flush toilet. i think ex-cons should get to vote. i think we should be giving much more food away. i think the drug companies making a killing - literally! - off the aids crisis in africa should have their patents revoked. i think if you appeal to the best in people then a large part of the time that is what you will get. i think that if you have appealed to the best in people (i.e. given diplomacy at least a little more chance than a snowball in hell) and gotten nothing then, yes, steamrollers and napalm may be entirely appropriate. and no big loss. but if you have not given it a chance then you are a rotten bastard as much as anyone else.

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i have a problem.

i want a wedding zine for my demographic: the one that, if there was an intersection between modern bride and real simple, if real simple lived up to its name, which it doesn't, would make up that intersection.

But there is no point at which they meet. Or at which they would, if ... well, whatever.

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there are going to be far too many of us with all the same names, again.

there were many lizes in high school. i think people knew my last name, then. though i was lizzie, to some, for a bit. and then there were many in beloit. and i was Certain Liz, for a while, and that was quite a good time and i enjoyed it. i hope if anyone ever googles Certain Liz, i come up. and then i was M's Liz. only there was a bit of time in between, of course. i found out a month before graduation that people actually knew my last name, but didn't know i guess which liz was connected with that last name, but that ... i don't know. i was confused by it. but somebody said 'oh, you're liz ****** - wow, i've heard of you.' which was so utterly bizarre, and they had known who i was before then and just not known my last name - ahh, it was weird. there were other lizes that were identified mainly by their boyfriends - i suppose, too, that M was singled out from all the other m's as Liz's M. but it was ...surprising. that, first, people knew that there was a liz ****** but didn't know who i was. Very odd.

and it was kind of bad-feminist of me to allow myself to be identified by my boyfriend, yes. but it was - and still is - a minimal issue.

and then little mk found me on friendster - he's all grown up looking - and all the other m's are going to come crawling out of the woodwork, now, i'm absolutely convinced of it. sometimes it felt like there were dozens of them. all very nice, and all loved dearly and separately in their own way, but dozens.

not that it would be a bad thing. but i already have three christies.

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and the toilet's in. and it works. so as soon as i finish grouting and touch-up paint ... we'll have a fully functional, very pretty, purple, second bathroom.

assuming nothing leaks.

and pictures are coming - i just have one more to take to finish off the roll and i'll get them developed tonight or so, but i don't know when i'll have access to a scanner (the one at work is attatched to a computer that people have, for some reason, started to use almost nonstop the past month or so, when usually it's vacant. so i don't know when it'll be free again) but as soon as i do there will be pictures.

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it looked like it was going to all morning - all gray and dense, less like walking through soup than through mashed potatoes or maybe tapioca pudding - and then all at once there's this crack and the sky opens up and everything is instantly drenched. and by the time you recover enough to wonder, thirty seconds later, i closed my windows, right, it's too late, because it's coming down that fast. and it lasts a half hour or so and then it's muggy, and sweat the rest of the day, again.

mom asked me, from new york, if i could imagine forty percent humidity. imagine, i don't know. i think maybe i can remember it.

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i used to play dodgeball.

i was never any good except for that one day - i might have been eight or nine - there was this very athletic, popular, cool, tall boy, who had gotten everyone out, absolutely everyone, except me, probably because i was too small for him to aim at properly. i used to be verrry smmalll. so anyway everyone was out except for me and him. and no i wasn't really cheating - because i knew of course if i picked up the ball and threw it at him, he'd catch it. so he kept trying to hit me, and i ran away, and he went and got the ball, and threw it at me, and i dodged, and this continued.

And this continued and everyone was bored and it was almost a foregone conclusion - but.

And then i caught it. which meant, of course, under the local rules, that not only was he out, but everyone who he got out (namely, everyone) was back in.

our games usually lasted a while.

but anyway i caught it, and there's this moment of stunned silence, and then everyone comes flooding back onto the dodgeball ground / basketball court, and he gives me this evil, black stare and goes and sits on the kerb, and i throw it at somebody and miss and after a bit i get out and he gets back in, and he couldn't be pissed at me because i'm eight years or so younger than he is, and diminutive, and a girl, so it'd look bad on his part if he paid any more attention to me than he ever had.

but i always rather liked dodgeball after that. i duck good.

also i bet that's how the movie ends.

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...and the black pits of despair: he's mistaken and isn't really leaving until tomorrow.

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*little happy dance in my head*

found out this morning: boss is leaving in an hour. Gone till thurs. things are always so much better when he's gone.

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re: more on metafiction ... watched Annie Hall last night. i can see why it got all the oscars. it made me giggle. a lot. i like woody allen. it's okay when woody allen makes movies about movies (or when vonnegut writes about writing) because they aren't asking to be taken seriously. if Army of Darkness took itself seriously, it'd be awful. when woody allen takes himself seriously he isn't funny any more and loses large parts of his charm.

i can't remember reading something in which vonnegut is really, really taking himself seriously. he's ironic and satirical (i wish satyrical was a word, don't you?) and writes about serious things, certainly, but ...

hey, who knew vonnegut does art, too? hehe, mondrian's socks are funny. much more fun than mondrian himself. mondrian was definitely a guy who took himself, and his art, way too seriously. hey, m, guess what: vonnegut's favorite band is phish.

know what my favorite part of the movie is? when woody allen says annie hall's family is like norman rockwell. 'cuz i'd never seen this movie before. but i've mentioned to m how his family is ...

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ahhh, see, i'm not crazy, and i'm also not totally without class. i knew i was okay, i just knew it.

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texan foibles vol. 6?
we're going to a (local people, local planning, locally registered, local everything, very handy) wedding on saturday. and they registered for knives. and that always seems weird to me. there was another wedding we went to recently... (only this was the kind of wedding where they have an engagement party (i skipped), three bridal showers (i went to one), and a bachelorette party (which i also went to), and a bachelor party.) ... and i kind of felt like they were so trolling for presents ... the men are lucky, they don't have to buy stuff for bachelor parties ... but anyway ... at the bridal (no, wait, they had three bridal showers, and a wedding shower) at the bridal shower i went to somebody bought the bride one of the expensive knives she registered for and everybody made those funny nervous jokes.

but that bride is ... well ... she's one of those Texan brides that has a pistol and a concealed-carry liscence and is a crack shot. a better shot than the groom was, so i hear. or so the groom says. and i figure he'd know.

but anyway somebody bought her this expensive knife. and that's all well and good, i know, very useful around the kitchen. i think she did actually register for a rolling-pin, too. This wedding, they didn't register for a rolling-pin, at least. But they're very nice and we're happy for them and we'll get them - some nice safe towels, or something.

a lot of the time we get barware. nice beer-drinking glasses, martini glasses, stuff like that. m's cousins keep getting married and registering at Target, which is lovely, because we can get them Target gift cards and they Love Them. everybody likes a good Target gift card.

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it's also cheating when people ask, rudely, for large quantities of expensive or hard-to-get stuff for a free thing. there are good swaps - i'm getting a handful of pebbles, if i decide i care, i guess - there's a slightly used Happy Meal hamburger-shaped toy, or positive gossip about you, or "a PERSONAL thank you", or a postcard from Algeria. i think a postcard from Algeria would be fun. but there are some really dumb people. urrgh.

also it's thunderstorming and pouring down and whenever the power goes out, the security system at work goes bonkers and noisy and annoying as hell. so today is really, really, really fun. since it's not supposed to stop thunderstorming until, oh, next year.

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stephen king is morbid. and i hate metafiction. it's so ... it always seems like a copout, like the artist is just asking to be ... silly.

(warning - matt, oz, kim if you're here - )
(VAGUE SPOILER)
though in this case, maybe, it adds a little bit of suspense, or something, but i hardly think it was neccessary. i dunno. i suppose i don't mind it quite so much when vonnegut does it, but he writes in first person anyway. And he's loony, which makes a lot forgivable. but that moment - in the neverending story, right? where they all look into the camera and say If You Don't Believe, This Will All Go To Hell - i hate that. i have since the first time i saw it, when i was still very small. i don't like it when shakespeare makes smarmy comments about acting. i don't like it when painters paint easels. i don't like movies about filmmaking.

it's cheap. and it's cheating.

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bill
Let us utilize the product of the grapevine, let us not inquire into its
mysteries with these our oh so sibilantly simian fingers but rather
delight in its miraculous molecules and their marvelous moonshine. Let us
utilize, O my brother, the product of the cocoa bean, the product of the
coffee bean, let us utilize O brothers and sisters the products of God's
green earth. Let us utilize the sawtoothed herb of the earth. Let us
utilize the joybuttons O my kin, be they peyote or pussy or be they
panic, let us utilize all the great goodnesses God has given us on this
green earth. Let us utilize the blue glory of noonday sky, the blue
glory of my brother's midnight eyes, the blue glory of a booby nest.
Let us utilize, O my kin, all that we may and all that we can,
and then all that we may not or can not and let us utilize all the
world in these three fair dimensions. Let us utilize, O my brothers,
the rivers in this our land, let us utilize fields and streams and
forests, O my sisters, O my brothers, let us utilize the furry fecundity
of our bretheren the animals, let us utilize the yellow newness of
buds in spring, the goldy yellow fruits in summer, the cracking yellow
fallen leaves in winter, the yellowly bare branches in winter. O my
aquafraternies, let us utilize the chicken and the egg, before and
after and during each other, all without end, as God intended us to
wonder which was first and which was second so shall we wonder which
came first, the chicken and the egg simultaneous generation slipped
eternal, each springing from the other through time, chickens from
eggs and eggs from chickens- so in honor of the great commoner, Mencken,
don't touch that. Let us utilize, O my brothers and sisters, the
red wheelbarrows, let us utilize the golden figurines on promenade
through the city, let us utilize Paterson New Jersey and let us utilize
Exit 7A. Let us utilize Route 9 and Route 69, let us utilize the
great Mississippi River and let us utilize that great grand Transcanadadian
Tollway up in the frozen north. O kin, let us utilize the Kerouac
of California and of New York and of Georgia, let us utilize Johnny
Appleseed of Ohio and Wisconsin, let us utilize Woodie Gutherie of
Washington and Tennesee. Let us utilize, O my brothers and sisters,
the hitchhiker's thumb, let us utilize the trains and the planes and the
automobiles, let us utilize our feet that carry us over this great
big planet that is so miniscule in even our solar system, O my kin
let us utilize Galileo and Mir and let us utilize all the great thinkers.
Let us utilize, O my brothers and sisters, the Freudian imagery that
pops to mind when I say Joybutton Jellybean. O nine-to-fivers of the
world, let us utilize the weekend, let us utilize those two weeks off
per year, and let us utilize them to their utmost limit.

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m says i get all fixity sometimes.

this happens, i have to admit.

but we're thisclose to done with the bathroom - at least the parts we can do ourselves and don't have to pay someone else for - so i'm excited. we may already have a working sink. (have to wait overnite for the grout and stuff to dry before running water over it.) we have four walls, with baseboard, and a ceiling, and a floor. we have a bathmat and towels and washcloths. we have a translucent purple wastebasket. we have a vanity with a sink on top of it.

all that's left is the medicine cabinet/light fixture (which we can do ourselves, probably), the toilet (which we can't), and the towel bars and toilet-paper-holder and junk (which we can do, quite frankly, in our sleep). Maybe a little more grout along the sink.

Assuming the fixture doesn't leak.

but so i was excited so i fixed the broken tile in the other bathroom. and then i was going to do something else - i don't remember what - but m stopped me and gave me a cup of tea. as soon as the bathroom is Actually Done i can redo the stuff around the bathtub in the other one - it's all mildewy and gross, but it's hard to spend a day without a shower in summer in texas.

ooo - and it's a nice sink - i found where those fucking giant bastard roaches are coming into my house: the fucking side-drain of the other sink in the hall bath. Bastards. and sure, we've only had four so far this year, which is pretty fucking good, but two of them were last week, and the first one was in the hall bath in the sink, and the other was actually poking his little fucking antennae out of the side-drain. ballsy son of a bitch. so the nice new sink doesn't have a stupid side-drain. maybe i'm just not absent-minded enough, but i don't think it's entirely neccessary. especially since it lets those bastard roaches in.

eew.
eew.
eew.
eew.

if by not having a side-drain i can avoid three-and-a-half-inch bugs i'm all about it.

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i have 3 invites for gmail. First responders get 'em.

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so M likes the bedroom. it's blue. it was funny painting it because i chose a color and then opened the paint-can and thought, that's a little more congratulations-newborn-boy than i was thinking. and then i put some on the walls and the color was fairly intense: it made the green that they had been look orange. i swear. only it was still baby-pastel. but it changed color like mad as it was drying. it dried a bit and turned a bit greenish itself, and i thought, hmmm. then it went back to bluish, hit robins-egg, looked for a bit like a boy's room who's really into racecars and baseball, which really made me nervous, but then went on past and got darker. and richer. and deeper. but then i had to put another coat on and started all over again. eventually (i.e., the next day) it's now, finally, exactly what i wanted: sort of mediterranean, islandy, spa-colored. water. sky. i think it's my favorite color.

the ceiling is that kind of white that if you put it next to white, would also be blue, but as it stands (next to the decidedly blue walls), it's white. have some big long crinkle-voile curtains, in big fat ivory and yellow stripes. have some nice silver-dollar silk flowers in a ... d-i-y vase. and our furniture looks stellar next to the rich blue. and silvery-nickel accents - the knobs on the furniture, and the curtain-rod, and a picture frame, and the sconces, and the clock. i couldn't stop looking at it when i finished. and the hungarian painting (this one, but this is another of his and it's HUGE and i WANT IT) and i framed a card from M's parents - a van gogh print (speaking of van gogh, i really like one of a farmhouse in a wheatfield with two figures, in auvers, just for my own reference, but i'm not really sure what i might do with it - looking for the name of it - jeez, he did enough with the wheatfields, didn't he? - i think i like the greeny ones - some of the olive trees, for instance - though really i'm not so much with all those identical irises - or any of the flowers really - ah, hell, they're not going to have it at barewalls and i'm not clicking through every separate painting at vangoghgallery.com, i'm not) only i had to spraypaint the frame silvery b/c it started a coppery gold and that just wasn't going to cut it.

so it's gorgeous. i couldn't stop looking at it. mmmm :)

the whole thing has an overall aesthetic very much like a Corona commercial. i realized this after i used an empty beer bottle as the d-i-y vase and it fit perfectly.

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how fucking cool is stephen king: our birthday (which happens to be a tuesday this year) sees the publication of the last book in the dark tower series. it'd be a birthday present just especially for me, only it's his birthday too, so .. um ...

woot!

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just for me: netflix sorcerer's stone and remember this link. i think i would like it.

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i have successfully trading spacesed m. (while he was out.)

all by myself. in two and a half (okay, maybe three) days. without paige davis or any oiled-up-sexy carpenters or a picky-picky designer or a second homeowner or any cameramen. With two needy, needy dogs, constantly in the way, missing their daddy. In the rain. On a much more strictly limited budget than they get on TV.

we'll see if he likes it. Ohhh, it's beautiful.

further discussion and, if i get around to it, pictures of my new master bedroom will be posted ... ah ... as events warrant.

also, the whole house smells like fucking charcoal smoke because the neighbors' son is house-sitting for them and has barbecued every night since friday. which is fine. but i figured they wouldn't be barbecuing last night because it was fucking pouring, and they don't have a roof over their deck, so i opened the window a bit, and left to go get some picture-frames and spray-paint and milk and raisin bran crunch and healthy-choice, and they barbecued. with WAY too much lighter fluid. but the house didn't burn down (theirs or ours), so it's all ok. it was all going to smell like charcoal sooner or later anyway.

the milk and raisin bran crunch and healthy-choice go in the kitchen, not the bedroom, you freak.

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sometimes it sucks being right. like here is an article that says that still women are paid less than men. 26% less. so i'm right that women are paid less than men - which has come up at work, though not as a specifically appliccable issue to ME, but as a sort of national phenomenon. and there's this Uninformed Person who disbelieves it. i'm not going to quote it at him because he wouldn't believe the article anyway and i generally try to avoid him, and in particular discussing things with him on which it is possible to either be uninformed or have an opinion.

once he tried to argue that it was just as hot in new york, year round, as it was in texas. yeah. Uninformed Person.

so it's good to be right, obviously. but it's such an awful thing to be right about. it'd be great to find a really, really, even more Uninformed Person, and have a series of arguments with them, and at the end have them be right about things - have god or somebody come down and say, liz, you know, *alackazam* they're right about some stuff: And it would be less than happy to be wrong about, oh, everything, but i'd make that sacrifice. you know?

and, they keep showing the knights tale movie on tv, over and over and over, and i keep hoping it'll not be really as bad as i remember it being, and give it a shot, and within seconds, it keeps being even worse. Ugh.

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there was a Don't Date This Person call-in bit on the radio. and it sounded like it might be fun to have a name in my head to call in with and say Don't Date So-and-so. only i couldn't think of anyone. i thought i might say Don't Date M., 'cuz he's my fiance, bitch, but that would be boring and they wouldn't play it. but my exes have all been exes for long enough now that i don't bear them any ill will. maybe one of the side effects of a long, happy relationship. so anyway i couldn't call them in.

But. I. Can. ...

somebody date - and i'm going to use their real names because ... well, they did on the radio - somebody date cheyenne from schaumburg. Really. he's nice, i promise; he only talks about all those other women (i always wonder if he talks about me now as much as he talked about them back then?) because he's ...sensitive? yeah. and somebody date olevano from vestal. he's sweet. and he deserves to have someone date him properly, after me. Poor kid. he'll take it mmmm kind of speedy, maybe, but that's certainly what some people are looking for. and he doesn't have your garden-variety commitment issues, either. um. definitely somebody date andy from california; he's just too much fun to pass up. A for effort, dude. and all the people from high school. and all the people from powell house.

k. i'm going to be done with that now - i have to paint the bedroom before matt gets back and i need to go to lowes and get a ceiling-roller:

 
 



 

 
 


it's really hard to get wood-color in hexadecimal. i'm such a nerd.

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*sigh* matt's granpa is gone.

and i know, i know, i know, i have all these things in my head to make it okay, after everything - and i still can't quiiiiite convince myself.

cuz really, somewhere, it's never okay.

i have a lot of anger, i think.

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so at work they have this little newsletter, once a month. and every month there is a trivia question. human resources asked for three little known facts about each employee so that people could guess them - i've mentioned this before, i think.

so this month, it's me. my trivia are:
  1. this person collects weird food and has eaten liverwurst, brains, octopus, et c.
  2. this person's high school did not have a football team.
  3. this person was once briefly held for questioning behind the Iron Curtain.
only nobody is guessing anything. i think my trivia are too obscure. so HR asked me for another tidbit of information to distribute via email - so somebody can guess and win the prize (free lunch at a local deli i've never particularly liked). and i'm thinking. it can't be the Shower Art from Beloit, because it quite simply can't. i'm looking at other people's trivia for ideas. i speak french, very badly, with a haitian accent. i speak hungarian even less. i'd have to decide on a favorite movie before i could list one as trivia. i am the eldest of two children? how boring is that? i am desended from nobility on one side and rebellion on the other. i am eligible for the daughters of the american revolution. i am a first-generation American. i am a (moderately lapsed) quaker. i played tympani in junior high. my high school had the best varsity fishing team in the state. i'm a Virgo, and i was born in the year of the Goat, but honestly i think astrology is bullshit. i think chicken pizza is disgusting. both my and my fiances mothers teach english, and our dads teach math. i've been to Amsterdam. i've been to Mardi Gras. once my parents drove to british columbia by mistake. i make a pretty fine lasagna. i have a kevlar canoe. i have two dogs. i have an aunt that's allergic to garlic, onions, leeks, scallions, and the rest of that whole family, and i simply can't ever let her come to my house because there's nothing, absolutely nothing, i could feed her. it was my idea to name the dog after the bar. i have 450 thread-count sheets and i think they were worth every penny. i went to boarding school, but it never seemed to matter. i'm pretty handy with a cordless drill. i'm also pretty handy with a sewing machine or a wok. i built my last computer. i like adjectives a little too much. i think i eat pizza more than is really healthy. i think emeril lagasse is a dumbass. i hit the sleep button about four or five times before getting up in the morning. i can be snarky sometimes but i hate the Gilmore Girls expressly because they're snarkier than me and i feel inferior. i can change a tire. i saw ralph nader speak in 2000 and tom robbins was right, he's still charismatic. i think the president is a dickhead. i think freud is a dickhead. but i do like hemingway.

a lot of the time, people will say things like 'I am a desendent of General Sam Houston.' but that's not about them - that has nothing to do with them, or with who they are as a person, or anything that helps anyone else know them better. but a lot of people talk about cool things their parents have done, or cool things their grandparents or even farther back have done - things they had no impact on, and that quite possibly only a minimal impact on them. What would really be more interesting would be 'I play General Sam Houston in reenactments.' dorky, but at least that would be relevant to their actual life, a decision that they made. And 'i have a passion for cooking.' Boring. and honestly, who doesn't? nobody ever likes anything unique - there's nobody who plays the trumpet on Thursdays at a smoky bar, there's nobody who's won prizes for their model trains, there's nobody who has a tattoo of their dead cat surrounded by pansies. it's unbelievable how many people think 'i really like football' is an exciting, or even vaguely enlightening, fact about who they are as human beings. how empty must your life have been to have that be one of the most interesting things about you? we have crummy trivia.

Only i'm censoring myself with this stupid newsletter - it can't be anything about sex, obviously; it can't be anything about rivers or canoeing, because there's a Crazy Person (crazy in a Very Bad Way) who goes canoeing, and he's not allowed to know that we go too. don't want it to be totally lame. don't want it to be about someone other than me (i.e., parents, ancestry, etc). i can't tell them i'm a quaker of any sort, because then i'd have time for nothing but explaining What Quakers Are for the next three months; nobody ever says anything religious. i can't tell them anything political because then they'd all hate me.

it's supposed to be something interesting, but something that people know me for. arrrrgh.

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a tree limb fell on our house last night. not a very big one but at six in the morning we both wake up to this CRASH essentially right above our heads, only really not, and probably over the bathroom. and What the fuck was that? because there had been a massive, massive thunderstorm at two in the morning or so, and we thought it was over, only there was this big noise. and it was light outside and not raining. so we get up and put on robes and go out and look and it's not on the long side of the roof, so we didn't see it right away, and matt goes up in the attic and i take a shower and matt doesn't see anything in the attic so i get dressed and walk around to the garage side of the house - for the first short side of the roof - and that's fine - but then on the bedroom side of the house, the other short bit of roof, there's this tree limb. and we go back in the attic and it doesn't look like there's anything - we can't see light coming through the roof or anything. but it was a Very Large Crash. especially for early in the morning. and we already have a quote from some roofers (the hailstorm last xmas, only we got a new air conditioner with the money from the insurance, but we got quoted b/c we wanted a new roof before, we just wanted the A/C more (and more immediately before summer kicked in), so now i want the roofers there to Fix It Now.

i don't think it'll take them long. day or two. we'll see. but they have financing. which is pure genius of them.

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